We've been fielding a few questions about our Pajama Party Meatup tomorrow night at the Bell House (do you really not have a ticket yet?), so we thought we'd clarify everything we have in store for you.
So, what's with this Pajamas bullshit? Do I seriously have to come to this thing wearing pajamas?
Look, homie (is it aight if I call you homie?): you can wear whatever the fuck you want. Pajamas are not a requirement. We just thought it would be fun to play dress up, and then we thought that if we *are* dressing up, pajamas would be a whole hell of a lot easier than doing, say, a Jon & Kate Plus Eight V-day Meatup. Also, our buds at Babeland were nice enough to offer up a killer prize for the best dressed PJ-wearer (2 tix to one of their slutty workshops and some other rad sex toy stuff!). So yeah, wear em if you want (we are), don't if you don't. We do live in motherfucking America after all, so you decide if you wanna go for the gold or not. It's a free country.
How come there were more girls than guys last time? Will it be better this time?
Fuck if we know (and yes, hopefully). Our theory is that girls like to plan ahead and guys don't. So girls typically buy their tix ahead of time, have their outfits planned, and are ready to rock before the dudez are even remembering that "oh yeah...that singles thingy is tonight." Needless to say, its annoying...and we've tried to pull out all the stops in order to make sure that the crowd is a bit more even Steven (we set up separate ticket links, got a link on Thrillist this time around, and are even offering a last minute 2-for-1 dudes special!). But if anyone else has any other ideas, please share em. Aside from offering a free blowjob with each ticket purchase, not sure what else we need to be doing to get the dudes on board in a bigger, stronger, faster way.
Why do I have to give you 5 words about myself when I get an advance ticket?
Cause we're matchmaking all you advance ticket buyers (and ONLY you advance buyers)! This stuff takes time, so we're ending advance sales tomorrow morning. After that, you can get tickets at the Bell House itself, where you'll have to rely on the hour of FREE Lillet cocktails + Smuttynose IPAs from 7-8 and the hook up games to gain the courage to hit on someone.
Do I Have to Speed Date or Play Stupid Hook Up Games?
No...in fact, if you don't already have a speed dating ticket, you can't do it. (And we've got 10 more spots for dudes only at this point!). BUT, if you are lucky enough to have a ticket, you'll be speed dating your ass off with Miss Jinners of "I heart nerds" speed dating fame. This chick is already legendary. As for the hook up games, they're totally, 100% voluntary. But we dare you to say no to the woman dressed like a bunny, telling you to play suck and blow.
Workin it with the ladies makes me really hungry. You got anything to eat at the Meatup this time around?
Yes and HELLS YES. Asia Dog was such an over the top hit the last time around, they'll be back for more singles fun. And trust: if you missed em the last time, you don't want to make that mistake again. Their shit is DELICIOUS. And for dessert, Robicelli's Cupcakes will be in the house! You may remember Robicelli's from Cupcakegate 2K10 a few weeks ago, but as of Thursday, you'll be remembering them for putting AMAZINGLY DELICIOUS CUPCAKES AND FROSTING straight down your pie hole. They're working out their final flavors, but the "Maltz" is a definite ("a luscious combo of chocolate, bourbon and bacon) as is the Strawberry Cheesecake. These things are legendary, ppl.
What kind of other shit will there be to do at this V-day Partay?
Well, let's see...there will be:
- FREE Lillet cocktails and Smuttynose IPAs from 7-8pm for those of you that are poor and/or cheap.
- $3 Busch (beer) all night...and lots of real bush too.
- Hot DJ's: DJ Workhorse, AKA Jonny Con Carne (the killer DJ from our last event!) and some others like DJ French Toast, Jason Baker and DJ Just Iz will keep you dancing well past bedtime.
- The hilarious Sara Schaefer will be back for some sexy bedtime stories and a wet t-shirt contest-esque event that none of your asses will soon forget.
- Also we arranged for some REALLY freaky shit this time around. Like hookup games with crazy performance artists like Blizzard Bunny of Club Animals (YES, again, this is all optional, ppl. Sheesh! Relax!).
- Lots of other shit that we haven't figured out yet don't want to ruin the surprise of.
Will Twitter Biggie and/or Puff Daddy be there?
Maybe.
Can 40-year-old cougar MILFS get laid at the Meatup?
Probably. We covered this shit already, though.
Can gay people come to the Meatup?
Totally. Though true confessions: the crowd seems mostly straight. Which is why we have a killer, kick-ass BIG GAY MEATUP in the works that will, no doubt, make all these straight mofos totes jel when we rock that shit out (if you're gay, and wanna help us plan, drop us an email!).